Reasons For Living
by ladyroi
Summary: Erestor loses his mate and thinks he will never find love again. Years later a certain reborn elf makes his way to Imladris. Slash but nothing too bad.
1. How do I live?

Author's notes: This is my first fic so please be kind when reviewing. Constructive but kind.I also need a Beta if anyone is interested in the non-paying job.

Summary: Erestor loses his mate and thinks he will never find love again. Years later a certain reborn elf makes his way to Imladris. This is slash but nothing too graphic. Hence the PG-13 rating I've settled on.

Disclaimer: I own nothing except for the occasional OC. Please don't sue. I don't have much except for a cat. And he's not a pure breed or anything so you wouldn't get much for him. Thanks!!

Prologue:

Erestor closed the door to his study; grateful this day was over. He briefly considered locking the door but decided against it. Lord Elrond or the twins may wish to look in on him. Heavens forbid he was given more than five minutes to himself. He immediately regretted that thought. The entire household had been nothing less than supportive over the last few days. Erestor sank into the chair closest to the window. He almost stood again when he realized it was her chair, but after the past week he lacked the energy. "Sabariel, how do I go on without you? I have no reason to remain here."

"That, dear Erestor is a lie and you know it," a soft feminine voice answered him. "You have a very good reason to continue to live."

For one moment his heart skipped a beat as he thought his wife had returned to him. Then sanity took hold as he placed the voice coming from his now open doorway. "My Lady, I am sorry, I didn't hear you come in." He made to rise, but Celebrian waved him back down.

"Erestor, I cannot begin to comprehend the pain you are experiencing, but you must not give into this despair," Celebrian soothed sinking into the chair opposite of the counselor. She may not have her mother's powers, but she could easily see the depth of the elf's pain.

"Why?" he asked.

"The one good reason I mentioned," Celebrian said.

"Which is?" Erestor prompted wearily. He wanted, no needed, to be alone, but he could never throw Celebrian out. Even if she wasn't Elrond's wife she was one of Erestor's closest friends.

"Seven years old with her mother's hair and her father's eyes."

Erestor cursed himself silently. He was so caught up in his own misery that he had ignored his own child. He couldn't even rightly say he knew where his daughter was at that moment.

"I saw her go into the stable shortly after the service. Lindir followed her to make sure she was okay. Sabariel loved you and she will always be with you. I know you miss her, but you are the adult. Your daughter cannot afford to have you break down." Celebrian rose to leave but turned back at the door, "But, when you can break down we will all be here to help." With that the Lady was gone.

Erestor thought about what the Lady had said. He was wise enough to realize she spoke both reason and truth. He couldn't come apart now. That would come later. But now, he had to find his daughter.

Lindir did not want to interrupt the girl while she was grieving, but the kind hearted minstrel could not ignore the child's pain. "Lorwen," he called out softly so as not to startle her. "Are you all right?" he asked wincing at the stupidity of that question. He peered over the closest stall and felt his heart break.

Lorwen lay curled up on a bale of hay hugging her knees to her chest. Silent tears poured out of her green eyes to wet the front of her dress. She gave no indication she had heard the minstrel.

Lindir entered the stall and sat next to the child and reached out to rub her back soothingly. "It's okay," he whispered. "I know how you feel. I lost my mother and father at an early age as well. I know you feel alone, but you are not. You have the Lord and Lady, the twins, me, Arwen, and above all you have your ada. Things will grow easier over time."

The girl lifted her face for the first time to look at the white-haired elf. She truly liked Lindir and if he said things would become easier then they would. She decided to ask the question that had been weighing on her mind for the last few days. "Does Ada still love me?"

Lindir was startled at the question. Why would she ask such a thing? "Of course your father still loves you! He loves you more than anything on Arda."

"It's just that he hasn't paid me any mind since they told him Nana fell off her horse," Lorwen whispered. "The only thing he has told me was to stay out the way. That's why I came to the stables." She practically begged with her eyes for Lindir to reassure her.

"Your father had many grown-up things to do over the last week. He probably just meant for you to stay out of the study instead of hiding in the stables," Lindir soothed. Silently he was cursing the advisor. How could he spot a lie coming from a Mirkwood ambassador but fail to see his daughter was in such pain? "He loved your mother very much, and when someone loses someone they love they may not see the pain of others."

Lindir was unprepared when the child threw herself at him. He quickly recovered and wrapped his arms around her. "Let us go get something to eat. I wager you are hungry." At the child's nod the minstrel rose and headed back toward the Last Homely House. He would get the child a snack and then have a word with her father.

Erestor was close to approaching panic. His daughter was not in the stables. The advisor also checked their rooms, the library, and the music room. Lorwen was nowhere to be found. He lost his wife and he couldn't stand to lose his daughter. _Relax, _he ordered silently._ She is fine. Lindir is with her and he would let no harm come to her. Don't panic! She is with Lindir. Lindir who once, while still in his youth, thought it was a good idea to jump from a balcony with one of the Lady's finest table clothes as a cape. _With that though he took off running down the corridors of the House.

Five minutes, and a few inquires later, Erestor found his way to the kitchen. Lorwen was asleep with her head on a table next to a plate with a half-eaten sandwich. Lindir was seated opposite of her and Erestor could hear him humming a lullaby. Smiling softly, he approached his daughter. The look the minstrel leveled at him made him come up short however. He had never seen such a look of anger on the normally easy going elf's face before.

Both elves realized the kitchen had emptied out upon Erestor's arrival. The head cook had seen the expression on the minstrel's face when he first entered with the crying child and had correctly surmised it had something to do with the advisor. So she had hustled out her staff the minute the advisor walked in.

"Lindir, what is the matter? Is Lorwen all right?" He started forward toward his daughter.

"I found her crying in the stables earlier. She asked me if you still loved her and why you had ignored her for the last week," Lindir all but hissed.

"She asked what?" Erestor asked stunned.

"I reassured her that you love her above all things. I also told her that you did not mean to ignore her," Lindir rose and started toward the door. "Do not make me into a liar." With that he was gone.

Erestor sighed and gently picked his little girl up. They would make it through this. They had to. "Come, pen neth, it is time for us to carry on with our lives." Erestor walked out of the kitchen carrying his one reason for living with him.

Next chapter: Erestor meets an elf that will challenge the walls he has placed around his heart.


	2. Someday out of the blue

Author's notes: Me again! Once more: reviews (good or bad) are nice. Nothing is more gratifiying than knowing people are reading something that you wrote.

Summary: AU. Erestor loses his mate and thinks he will never find love again. Years later a certain reborn elf makes his way to Imladris. This is slash but nothing too graphic. This is rated PG-13, a fact I forgot to mention in the first chapter. Sorry.

Disclaimer: Once again I own nothing except the occasional OC who may wander by.

Beta: Leigh. Thanks! All remaining mistakes are mine alone.

Lorwen headed toward her father's study with the seating chart for the feast to welcome home Lady Arwen. She was about to knock when she heard her Erestor's voice and instead pressed her ear to the slightly ajar door. "Faelon, I am flattered by your attentions; however, I do believe you would be better off looking for a relationship elsewhere. Even if I was not your direct superior, I am far too old for you. You are almost as young as my daughter. We have completely different points of reference."

Lorwen ducked into the doorway of an adjoining room so she would be out of sight but could still hear everything in her father's study. So this month it was Faelon her father was letting down gently. Lorwen had lost count of the number of elves, female and male, her father had to have such talks with. As a child, she delighted in the fact no one was good enough to replace Sabariel. However, as she grew older, she realized her father shouldn't shut himself off from love. This epiphany, achieved with the help of Lindir, made her wish every new elf was the one her father would finally accept.

"But, Erestor . . . " Faelon started, clearly not happy with the advisor's decision. He was not an elf to give up on what he wanted. And he wanted the dark-haired elf. Faelon knew he could ease the pain Erestor had been in since his wife's passing. He just had to be given a chance.

"No, Faelon," Erestor interrupted firmly. "I cannot allow you to put so much energy and time into a relationship I know is doomed to fail. Surely, there is someone else who will love you as much as you deserve to be loved. Someone who is closer to your age and can share your same interests. Now don't you have work you should be attending too? There is the matter of the feast tonight. We must welcome Arwen home and greet the new captain."

Lorwen heard a muted agreement and then the other elf's footsteps heading down the corridor in the opposite direction. She counted to thirty before emerging from her hiding place and knocking on her father's now closed door. She didn't want her father to discover she had been eavesdropping.

"Enter," Erestor called. The frown on his face was lifted the second he spotted his daughter. "Lorwen, what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be working on the seating chart for tonight's feast?"

"That is what I came to show you. May I?" she indicated the top of the desk. Erestor moved some of his less pressing papers to the side and helped her spread out the chart. "The seat on Elrond's right is empty as always." That had been Celebrian's seat and was always left empty to honor her memory. "As usual, you will be to his left. The twins, Arwen, and the Lord and Lady of the Golden Wood will sit in their usual places. Now I was thinking we could put the new captain next to you. Since you two will be working closely together you might as well mingle." Erestor smiled. Only his child could make the word "mingle" sound like a punishment. "And I would move into the seat between Elrohir and Lindir."

Erestor studied the chart for a few moments and found no flaws. Thankfully, he could always count on his daughter. "This will work. I thank you for doing this for me. It is one less thing I have to worry about. Now, I have to go check on the cooks," Erestor said pushing back from his desk.

"I will go. I have to drop this chart off with the secretary in charge of the place cards," Lorwen hastily volunteered. She picked up the seating chart off the desk and headed toward the door.

"I can go to the kitchens. It is no ordeal for me to leave my study."

"No, I insist you allow me to do this," Lorwen practically begged.

"Why do you not want me to go to the kitchen?" Erestor asked raising an eyebrow in a fair imitation of Lord Elrond. Lorwen mumbled something. "What was that, my darling daughter?"

"The cooks are afraid of you ever since that incident with Lord Elrond's begetting day cake," Lorwen said a little louder. That was a day that would live in infamy in Imladris. To that very day no one was aloud to mention the words nutmeg and pepper in the same sentence within Erestor's hearing.

"Oh, I see. They fear me. Well, my work in the kitchen is done," Erestor sat back down and pulled a stack of papers toward him.

Lorwen started toward the door but then remembered the question she came to ask her father. "What is the name of the new captain Lord Celeborn recommended? I need to let the calligrapher know."

"Glorfindel," Erestor offered in an offhand matter. He watched his daughter nod and walk out. "Five . . . four . . . three . . . two . . . one," Erestor counted under his breath. He was rewarded when Lorwen stuck her head back into the room.

"Excuse me?"

Two hours ride from Imladris:

Glorfindel scanned his surroundings. As a seasoned warrior he wanted to make sure he was as familiar with his new home as possible. He also wanted to make sure Lady Arwen made it safely back home to her father. Orcs were stupid creatures, but he didn't know if they were stupid enough to attack such a well-armed party.

"Be at ease, Lord Glorfindel. These woods are safe. My son-in-law's soldiers see to that."

Glorfindel glanced to his right. "My apologies, Lord Celeborn, but once a warrior always a warrior." Glorfindel took one last look at the woods surrounding him before asking the question he had wanted to ask since this trip started. "What do you know of this advisor I am to be working with? This Erestor?" To Glorfindel knowing the people surrounding him was almost as important as knowing the land. "Lady Arwen has nothing but praise for him."

"My granddaughter is not just being polite. Erestor is a very skilled diplomat. He has managed to keep the peace between Mirkwood and Imladris for more than six hundred years. This is no small feat considering he is a Noldo and not easily trusted by King Thranduil. He is quite possibly one of the smartest elves Middle Earth has ever seen."

"Has he ever been a warrior?" Glorfindel asked. In Glorfindel's mind every elf could be classified in two different categorizes, those who were warriors and those who were not. Needless to say he thought slightly higher of the warriors.

"He was one of Gil-Galad's captains in the Last Alliance. However, as soon as the war ended he never picked up his sword again. He is just as effective with a quill and parchment," Lord Celeborn answered.

"Why would a captain lay down his sword?" Glorfindel asked. It was beyond him how anyone could give up one life for a life that was completely opposite.

"Well, Erestor was just past his majority when he became a captain. It was a field promotion. He was the only one in his company left alive after a particularly fierce battle," Celeborn confided with a note of sadness. He always became melancholy when thinking of those days. So many lives wasted and destroyed. Such sadness would reverberate through the ages.

He thought back to the first time he had seen the bloodied and muddied young elf. They were overjoyed at finding someone alive in the carnage. What surprised everyone the most was the young one's courage. Even while Elrond was working to save his arm and his life he was pledging allegiance to Gil-Galad and apologizing for not driving the company of orcs further back. Celeborn was not the only elf that was relieved when Erestor agreed to become a councilor and to lay down his sword. "He was always better suited to the life of a scholar." Celeborn's tone made it clear that pursuing this avenue of questioning would not be wise.

Glorfindel could take a hint when one was given one and he let the subject of Erestor drop. Besides, they were drawing closer to the Last Homely House. He turned his attention to the long list of things that needed to be accomplished. He had to see how many warriors Imladris boasted of. Then there were weapons, training schedules, patrols, the list seemed endless.

All the elves of any importance, and some that were not were gathered in the courtyard to greet the party from the Golden Wood. Elrond was especially anxious to greet his in-laws and his daughter. Ever since the attack on Celebrian he worried whenever Arwen was away. The fact the Celeborn always arrived to escort her to Lothlorien and then escorted her back was the only reason he agreed to these visits. As soon as the party was dismounted, he ran to wrap his daughter in a warm hug.

"Lord Elrond, may I present Lord Glorfindel of Gondolin," Celeborn ushered his son-in-law over. "Your new captain."

Glorfindel was painfully aware of the hush that had fallen over the courtyard. He didn't want these elves to view him as if he were some untouchable god. He had enough of that in Lothlorien.

"Mae govannen, Glorfindel. You are a most welcomed addition to this valley," Elrond turned to motion Erestor forward. "This is Erestor, chief counselor and my most trusted advisor. You will be working closely with him."

Glorfindel almost felt his heart stop when he first saw Erestor. Neither Arwen nor Celeborn had mentioned just how beautiful the advisor was. His naturally white skin and high cheekbones served to set off his forest green eyes. Green eyes were a rarity among the elves. As a matter of fact, Glorfindel had known just one other elf with green eyes. Ecthelion, his long lost friend.

"Mae govannen, Glorfindel," Erestor extended his hand. He looked a little uncomfortable as Glorfindel just continued to stare. He looked over at Elrond nervously.

Finally, Celeborn clearing his throat got Glorfindel's attention and he snapped out of the spell those green eyes had put him in and took the offered hand. "Mae govannen, Master Erestor. I apologize, but you reminded me of someone I once knew."

"It is quite all right. May I also present my daughter, Lorwen? She is my assistant and will be working with us as well." Glorfindel paid only enough attention to the chestnut haired elleth to note she had her father's eyes before once again focusing on the advisor.

His infatuation did not go unnoticed by all gathered in the courtyard. Elrond desperately hoped Glorfindel would not be added to the ever growing list of those spurned by the advisor. Hopefully, Erestor would allow Glorfindel to become a friend if not more. Sometimes, Elrond worried about his dear friend and the loneliness that he seemed to wear like an ill-fitting uniform.

Unfortunately, Elrond was not the only one to notice. No one paid any attention as Faelon slipped into the shadows of a wide pillar. He would not let this reborn empty-headed warrior take what was his. With that bitter thought, he turned and stalked back toward his office.

What is Erestor's connection with the long dead Ecthelion? Is there even one? And how does an elf handle rejection? If you're Faelon, not very well. Next up: a feast and a plan or two.

Reviewer responses:

Thanks to those that reviewed. Please don't stop. Like I said, good or bad I like to know what people think.

Nevermind: I actually did have several earlier stories that were more cannon friendly. Alas, I lost them, along with a majority of my other computer disks, in my latest move. I hope to find them when my room mate unpacks her room finally. If I do find them I will post them, if not I will try to re-create them. I did enjoy reading the essay. I even wandered around the site for awhile. It was very thought provoking. Thanks for sending it to me.

Veryawen: Thanks! I hope you like this chapter as much as the first. Please keep reading and I will try to keep it interesting.

Haldir's Heart and Soul: (Blushing) Wow! Thanks for the review. Here's the next installment. Let me know what you think.


	3. Trust me

Author's notes: Well I'm back! This chapter is kind of long. I had a lot of free time due to "payroll reduction" which is corporate for "the hourly employees are costing us too much money so give them four days off." Not that I am bitter. Sorry, back to the note. Once again, feed back is nice. Strange one so shy craves attention. And, reviewer responses are at the bottom.

Summary: See Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Once again I own nothing except the occasional OC who may wander by.

Beta: Leigh. You rock! All remaining mistakes are mine alone.

* * *

"This cannot be!" Faelon slammed the door to his chambers. Faelon could not get the scene in the courtyard out of his head. How dare that . . . brute stare at Erestor in that way? He would not stand for this. He had worked too hard for too many years to get this close to the elf of his dreams and he wasn't going to lose out to Glorfindel! Twice born elf or no Faelon would not lose. "I will show him." He started to storm off toward the master bedroom.

"Show who what?" a timid voice asked from the doorway to the smaller of the two bedrooms.

Faelon gasped and turned around. "Melpomaen! What are you doing here?" He glared at his younger brother. "Shouldn't you be practicing with the other minstrels?"

Melpomaen's face lost all color and he hugged his harp closer. His brother always managed to make "minstrels" sound like such an insult. "Lindir moved practice back by an hour. Lord Elrond wanted him to greet the minstrel that came with Lady Arwen," Melpomaen whispered.

"How many times do I have to tell you not to mumble?" Faelon sighed in frustration and headed toward his own room. He turned suddenly. "I will probably find someone at the feast tonight to share the evening with. Do not come back here until the morning."

"Where will I go?" Mel asked although he knew what his brothers answer would be.

"I don't know and I don't care. For once can you think for yourself?" With that he slammed his door shut. He had an evening to plan. The first step was paying his friend, Saelbeth, a visit. The healer would have just what he needed.

_Guess things went badly with Erestor this morning_, Mel thought heading toward the door. The young minstrel felt sorry for whichever elf his brother managed to trap tonight. Faelon could be rather emotionally cruel at times.

* * *

Meanwhile in Lord Elrond's office: 

Lorwen barely refrained from shifting nervously from one foot to another as she stood in front of Lord Elrond's desk. She couldn't think of a reason why she would be called in front of the Elf Lord. Actually, she admitted to herself, she could think of one reason, but she was rather confident that he couldn't have noticed the missing bottles of wine this soon. Why did she always have to listen to Elladan? At least neither of his eyebrows was arched.

"Lorwen, you have spent time with both your father and Lord Glorfindel today, correct?" Lord Elrond asked. He already knew the answer to that question. He knew almost everything that happened inside his borders. And that included the wine cellars. But, he was willing to let that go for now.

Lorwen tilted her head to the side in consideration. This was an unexpected topic of conversation. It took a moment to answer. "Yes, Lord Elrond. I've been assisting in getting Lord Glorfindel settled into his rooms and his office. Why?" she asked taking a seat when Elrond motioned her to.

"Did you notice anything in the courtyard today when I introduced Erestor and Glorfindel?" Elrond asked slightly perplexed. Usually, Lorwen would notice an elf's attention toward her father. It was almost a hobby of hers. Sometimes she encouraged the elf and other times she did her best to dissuade the elf.

"My apologies, Lord Elrond, but I was distracted," Lorwen answered. "Did father and Lord Glorfindel not get off to a proper start?" She had been watching Faelon watch her father and only started to pay attention to the guests when Erestor called her name. She hadn't cared for the look in Faelon's eyes when he stormed off.

"Well, our new captain seemed quite taken with your father. But, Erestor is very fair to look upon. What do you think Glorfindel's chances are?" Elrond decided to get to the heart of the matter. If he was to secure help with his plan, he had to act fast.

Lorwen was so surprised by the question she actually blinked a few times before answering. Never had Lord Elrond shown so much interest in his advisor's love life. "Slim to none if I were to be honest," she replied fidgeting with one of her sleeves. So yet another elf was set to get his heart broken by her father. Twice in one day was a record even for him.

"Why? Is there some flaw in Glorfindel that you see that I do not?" Elrond frowned. This would not do at all.

"My Lord, the only flaw with him is that he is not my mother." _Not the eyebrow!_ Lorwen rushed on with her explanation. "Over the centuries I have seen him turn down nearly half the population of Imladris. The elves that approached him were too young, too old, too much a warrior, not enough of a warrior, not scholarly enough. He even told one elf they were too tall. The reasons are endless, but . . ."she trailed off.

"Lorwen, do you wish to see your father happy?" He waited for her to nod before continuing. "Then listen closely to what I am about to say," he whispered in a conspiratorial tone even though they were the only two in the room. Lorwen found herself leaning forward despite herself.

"Lord Elrond, you are brilliant!" Lorwen exclaimed after hearing his plan. "But, we will need help in this matter. I can handle Ada, but we need someone to get close to Lord Glorfindel. But who?"

Just then they heard an unmistakable voice humming in the hallway going past the door. "Oh, Lindir!" they called out in unison.

* * *

In Glorfindel's office: 

To say that Glorfindel was impressed with the counselor would have been an understatement. The combination of brains and beauty was amazing. Erestor had to have known he could coast through life on his looks, yet he was also a diligent worker. In the short time they had been in the office, Glorfindel had been shown a detailed map of Imladris, a roster of the warriors which were divided into who could wield a sword or bow well, and even a list of now retired warriors who would fight if the need arose. Erestor was quite possibly the most efficient elf he had ever come across. Pity he was obviously married.

"And these are the most recent inventories of weapons on hand," Erestor placed yet another parchment in front of the blond. "We are running short on training bows at the moment," he smiled apologetically. "However, a shipment will be arriving from Mirkwood in a few weeks."

Glorfindel nodded absently. He was only half listening to Erestor. He was fascinated by the way the light from the window gave the advisor's black hair dark red highlights. Glorfindel wondered how the hair would look in the moonlight. He snapped out of his musings when he realized Erestor was looking at him because he was staring. Flustered he said the first thing that popped into his mind. "You must be related to him," Glorfindel said.

"Pardon?" Erestor asked.

"Ecthelion. You remind me of Ecthelion. You resemble him greatly. Same hair color, eye color, even the same bone structure," Glorfindel elaborated. In his mind's eye he could see his friend standing beside the King Turgon in the fallen city. Those were happier times. He was so caught up in the memory he failed to notice the dark look that crossed Erestor's features.

"Yes I am related to him," Erestor said stiffly. He was saved from elaborating when the bells chimed. "It appears the hour grows late. We should retire for the day and get ready for the feast tonight." Erestor started to tidy up the desk out of sheer habit and maybe a bit of nervous energy. It had been years since someone mentioned Ecthelion to him.

Glorfindel noticed how tense it became when he brought up Ecthelion. Wanting to remove the tension he asked the first question that popped into his mind. This was no more successful than his earlier attempt at easing the tension. "Will I meet your wife tonight?" Glorfindel asked as he helped to gather up the parchments. He noticed Erestor grow still and the counselor would not meet his eyes. Glorfindel got the feeling he asked a question he should not have and may have made things even worse.

"My wife is dead. She has been for almost two hundred years," Erestor answered so quietly Glorfindel almost missed the reply. With that Erestor swept out of the room without a backward glance.

"Well, that went well," Glorfindel muttered under his breath. Could he have embarrassed Erestor and himself anymore? Probably not. "I wonder what her name was."

"Sabariel," a voice actually answered. For one moment, Glorfindel thought one of the Valar had responded then he noticed the elf in the doorway. "She was riding one of her new mares when a storm came up. Unfortunately, a bolt of lightning struck close by and spooked the animal. Sabariel fell and the horse accidentally stepped on her."

Glorfindel stared at the white-haired elf for a moment. "And you would be?"

"Lindir, chief minstrel of Imladris," Lindir did not offer to move from his position in the doorway.

"And, Lindir, do you make it a habit to eavesdrop?" Glorfindel asked.

"I wasn't eavesdropping. The only thing I heard was you asking what her name was," Lindir defended. He crossed his arms in front of his chest and struck a defiant pose. It was somewhat ruined by the fact he stood a good half a foot shorter than the warrior.

"Then how . . ."

"I saw Master Erestor leave and he had that look he gets when someone unintentionally brings up Sabariel. So I pieced it together in my mind," Lindir explained. "Among other things I have witnessed today."

"What does that mean?" Glorfindel asked.

"I saw the way you looked at him in the courtyard," Lindir said smugly. He held up a hand to stop Glorfindel from saying anything. "And, I would like to lend you a hand."

Glorfindel almost laughed out loud at the elf before him. "What kind of help could you offer me, Lindir? I doubt Erestor is one to be swept away by a song or poem." Glorfindel wanted to toss the younger elf out for his impertinence, but found himself intrigued. Could Lindir actually assist him?

"The kind of help, that comes from knowing Erestor for more than six hundred years. I've seen him turn down innumerable elves and I can help you avoid their mistakes," Lindir said growing even smugger. "Trust me."

"I fear he will never talk to me in a friendly manner. I brought up his wife," Glorfindel reminded the minstrel.

"Well, that is not a fatal error," Lindir soothed. Many elves would mention Sabariel and Erestor still remained friendly with them.

"And, I mentioned Ecthelion and he seemed to react badly," Glorfindel admitted.

"Oh, no," Lindir muttered. "Well, that is still something you can come back from. Just don't mention his grandfather again."

"Grandfather?" Glorfindel asked astounded. He wasn't aware that Ecthelion had a child. But, he was relieved to realize at least part of his friend lived on.

"Now, we must make you ready for the feast," Lindir said taking Glorfindel's arm and brushing off his last question. "Do you own anything crimson?" he asked as he led the Eldar from the room.

* * *

Erestor's rooms: 

"Ada! You cannot wear that," Lorwen said the instant she saw what her father had chosen. She could tell she had her work cut out for her. She sighed. _So much to do and so little time._

"Why not?" Erestor asked looking down at his formal attire. As typical of his style the material was soft, velvet, and black. "I wear it to every function."

"Exactly! This is Arwen's welcome home feast. She has seen you in that for over a decade." Lorwen threw open the doors to her father's armoire. "What about the nice formal robes she sent from Lothlorien?" Lorwen silently cheered at the look of discomfort on her father's face. He could never say no to Lorwen or Arwen. And when both of them set their minds on something it was all but a done deal. She pulled out the robes once she located them amongst all the black.

"But, they are so. . . . green," Erestor responded. He internally winced at how pathetic that excuse sounded. If he were honest with himself, he had to admit the dark green color was actually very nice. It was very thoughtful of Arwen to send him the robes for his begetting day.

"They go well with your eye color. Please?" Lorwen gave her father her best "just give in to me and save us all some time" look. She saw him wavering and moved in for the kill. "Nana always said green was your color." A low blow to be sure but when Lord Elrond gave her a task she meant to see it through.

Erestor said nothing. He simply grabbed the offered garments from his daughter and stalked into the bathroom to change. Once he was done, he stared at his image in the mirror. He did look different in the green robes. He couldn't decide if the change was for the better or not. He could be sure that Sabariel would have approved.

He came back into his bedroom to find Lorwen still there. She motioned for him to turn around which he grudgingly did. "You look amazing, Ada," she almost whispered.

"Thank you."

"Now, about your hair," Lorwen began. She wasn't really all that surprised when her father unceremoniously tossed her into the hallway and slammed the door shut. "I think I will just go get ready now," she called through the door before heading toward her rooms. She couldn't resist doing a little "happy dance" on her way however.

* * *

In one of the more secluded hallways of the Last Homely House: 

Saelbeth looked around the seemingly deserted hallway. He didn't know why Faelon insisted on meeting him here or why there was a need for all this cloak-and dagger business. Sometimes the young healer truly worried about his friend's mental stability.

"Did you bring it?" Faelon asked stepping out of the shadows and nearly scaring Saelbeth to death.

"Don't do that, Faelon! Have you no sense?" Saelbeth asked whirling around to face his friend. He pulled a package from his pocket. "And yes I brought it," he said tossing the scribe the small bundle. He felt a shiver climb his spine when he saw the feral grin on Faelon's face. "What are you going to do with it?"

"You don't need to know that," Faelon responded sliding the package into his own pocket. "I'll see you at the feast." With that Faelon disappeared into the shadows as quietly as he had appeared.

Saelbeth felt a sense of dread steal over him. _This is the last time I help him in this manner, _Saelbeth thought. _Whatever he has planned it will only end in tears_. With that last thought the healer turned and went back the way he came.

* * *

The Feast: 

Lindir and Lorwen smiled at each other when they noticed how almost every elf at one point or another had openly stared at Erestor and Glorfindel. Lindir had convinced Glorfindel to wear dark blue after finding a serious lack of crimson in the warrior's wardrobe. The color complimented both his hair and his complexion. Lindir had even managed to help Glorfindel braid his hair in an intricate pattern.

"They do make a handsome couple," Lindir whispered into Lorwen's ear.

"We shouldn't get too far ahead of ourselves. They've known each other less than a day," Lorwen answered back. "But, I don't think they can withstand the power that is Lord Elrond and his plan."

"Lorwen seems close to Lindir," Glorfindel remarked to Erestor as he motioned to the younger elves that were whispering about something. He silently congratulated himself. He had been speaking with Erestor for the better part of the hour and had yet to stick his foot in his mouth. After talking to the minstrel Glorfindel discovered what topics of conversation were safe. He learned that nothing opened Erestor up more than talking about his daughter.

Erestor let a small smile grace his face when his eyes landed on his only child. He had made up his mind to over look the fact that in a span of five minutes Glorfindel had managed to bring up the two most painful subjects to him. "Lindir is her closest friend," he remarked. "Has been since she was a small child. I couldn't always spend as much time with her as I would have liked. Thankfully, Lindir and Lady Celebrian stepped in and were there when I could not be."

"He is just her friend?" Glorfindel asked sipping his wine. He grimaced at the gritty taste. _It must be from Minas Tirith_, he thought. He held little esteem for the wine making abilities of the second-born. There had been some bad experiences in Bree when he was traveling with Haldir and his brothers.

"Just a friend," Erestor said taking up his own goblet. "He knows I would kill him if he touched her." Glorfindel chuckled. "I mean it. I can make it happen. They would never find his body. Lord Elrond and the twins would probably help."

Glorfindel looked at Erestor. The advisor certainly looked serious. Glorfindel once again wondered if he had crossed a conversation line. He decided not to push the issue. He went to set down his goblet at the exact moment Erestor chose to set his down. "Oh, I am so sorry!" Glorfindel apologized as the contents of both goblets spread across the once white table cloth.

Both Lorwen and Lindir chuckled as they watched the two elves try to mop up the mess. "Poor Ada. It's because he's left handed you know," Lorwen remarked. "That's why I usually sit next to him. I have a system."

"Which is?"

"Never do the same thing he is doing. If he is eating then I drink. If he is drinking, I eat. So far it has worked," she answered smugly. Suddenly she shivered as a feeling she couldn't place hit her. She scanned the table trying to locate the source of her discomfort. Then she noticed Faelon. She followed his gaze to Glorfindel. If looks could kill there would be no doubt they would find out if he was to be called the thrice-born Balrog slayer.

"Are you okay?" Lindir asked squeezing her hand under the table. He too noticed Faelon's stare. Why would the scribe be so mad about spilt wine? It wasn't like he would be the one to clean the table cloth.

"I'm fine," she squeezed his hand back. "Could I talk to you later? I am a little concerned."

"About what?"

"Erestor is looking," Elrohir cut in from Lorwen's left. The pair quickly let go of each other. "I don't think he noticed anything but you should be careful."

"Ada knows we are just friends," Lorwen responded.

"Yes and my Ada knew Arwen and Gildor are just friends, even when he had caught them holding hands in the garden at night. And how long has it been since he has been here? Fathers are overly protective of their daughters. It is the way of the world," Elrohir responded before turning back to his twin.

"Was he just holding her hand?" Erestor asked.

"I am sure it was an innocent gesture," Glorfindel assured him. He didn't like the look on the councilor's face. The word predatory sprang to mind.

"You are probably right," Erestor agreed as he took a sip from his new goblet of wine. "Glorfindel, how much do you know about hiding bodies?" he asked in his most innocent tone.

Glorfindel sputtered on his own wine. "What? Why do you need to know?" He wasn't fooled by the innocent look on the dark-haired elf's face. He also knew why that question had been asked. He would need to keep an eye on Lindir in the next few days and make sure nothing "unexpected" happened.

"Oh, no reason," Erestor turned back to his plate. _Maybe Gildor needs a new minstrel. I will have to ask him if Lord Elrond ever allows him back. Or maybe Celeborn would take him back to Lothlorien?_

Elrond silently congratulated himself. Those two were getting along famously. He felt they were definitely on the right track with this plan. He looked toward Lorwen and Lindir and raised his goblet. The two returned the gesture. It was a pity the trio did not see Faelon stalk out of the room as soon as dinner was over. Maybe they could have prevented what was to come.

* * *

Reviewer responses: 

GJ: Yeah, knowing how much time has passed would be important. I can't believe I missed that. Yeah, I can. That's what happens when you write at five in the morning. Anyway, using 50 as the age elves reach their majority (compared to humans at 18) Lorwen would have been 19 when her mother died or equal to a 7 year old human. It's been 250 years with Celebrian sailing 50 years before chapter 2. So the year is roughly 2560. I see Lindir as more of a mentor to Lorwen right now, but that may change. I still have the last 3 chapters to actually write.

Haldir's Heart and Soul: Erestor may give him a chance. Especially if Elrond has his way. And as for Faelon cooking up trouble, he seems to be more emotionally unstable than I at first imagined him to be.

Nevermind: A) Thanks for pointing out the Noldor Noldo mistake. I can't believe I missed that when I re-read the chapter before posting. Hopefully, I was able to correct that but you never know with B) Keep in mind I never promised they would end up together. They haven't told me how they wanted this story to end yet. And C): Curse you for giving me that link in your first review. I now return to that site every other day to see if there are any new essays. However after reading Writing Arda Immortals I did have this mental image of the characters from "Friends" in Middle Earth. It was disturbing (shudders).


	4. Bathed In Fire Carved In Ice

Hi! Yes, I am finally back. I appologize for the year lond absence, but my muses went on vacation (okay strike) and they still have not fully returned. But, they did send me this lovely postcard. I will warn you it is has not been beta read. I would feel bad to just drop it into April's lap since it's been so long. But, if you are still interested I still need someone. And, hopefully the updates will come quicker. I've fallen into my old writing mood and I am excited. I didn't realize how much I enjoyed it and missed it. Sorry, I will stop rambling now and on to the story.

_The defenses would not hold. Glorfindel had long realized that, but he continued to fight. He had to give Lady Idril and her son the chance to escape into the tunnels that had been designed for just such a purpose. Out of the corner of his eye Glorfindel saw an elf dressed in brilliant green and gold rush away from the battle and back toward the center of the city. "Ecthelion! Where are you going?" he called out even as he turned to face yet another attack. _

"_I have to check on them," Ecthelion called over his shoulder. "They may not be able to find their way!" _

"_Check on who?" Glorfindel called out in confusion, but the Lord of the Fountain had already vanished into the crowd. Glorfindel had little choice but to turn back to the battle and face yet another of their endless opponents. They had to ensure that all that could escape would be able to. When this was all over he would find Ecthelion and ask where he had gone off to. Then, an unnatural twilight fell upon the city._

Glorfindel sat up in bed panting. Glad that the dream was over he swung his legs over the side of the bed. He knew what would happen next. What followed was forever etched into his memory. Ecthelion would fall in battle and then he would as well. He had tried not to dwell on the past since his rebirth. There was nothing he could do to change what had occurred. To remember all that he had lost that day was just an exercise in futility. Glorfindel shook his head to clear it of such depressing thoughts.

Glorfindel stood up and crossed the room. With a shaking hand he poured himself a glass of water. He would have much preferred alcohol, but he would be holding training sessions early the next morning. And, he seriously doubted he would be able to stop at one glass.

He crossed over to his balcony doors and swung them open. What he truly needed was fresh air. Stepping across his threshold he looked to his left and for a moment felt his heart leap. From his balcony he could see into almost the entirety Erestor's office.

* * *

Erestor was hunched over his paperwork, unaware that he was being watched. Even something as important as a welcome home feast for Lady Arwen would not stop him from completing his daily work. He didn't mind the early mornings and the late nights. Since Lorwen had moved out a decade ago there was no one there to greet him at night and to see him off in the morning. 

"_Erestor, if you do not come away from that desk I shall go on this picnic without you." _

Erestor looked up half expecting his wife to be standing in the doorway with a picnic basket in her hand. "Please, not tonight," Erestor pleaded with no one in particular. He didn't want to relive this particular memory.

"_Sabariel, I have to finish this report," Erestor responded in mock irritation. "Whatever surprise you have for me can surely wait for another ten minutes."_

"_Fine," she responded with a pout. "But, if you work any slower I will have other company." She gave him that mysterious smile that begged him to ask who._

"_And who would that be?" Erestor asked falling for the ploy._

"_Our child," she responded in an almost off-handed manner. _

"_We don't have a child..." Erestor trailed off and looked at his wife. Truly looked at her for the first time in a few weeks. She was even more radiant than usual and there was that mysterious gleam in her eyes. "Are you saying that you are...?" He couldn't finish the sentence for fear that it was not true. _

"_Yes," Sabariel nodded happily. Erestor stood and crossed the room in five long strides. He wrapped his wife in a tight embrace and almost immediately loosened his grip and placed his hand on her stomach apologetically. "It's okay. I don't think you can hurt the baby by hugging me," she said giggling. _

"_Faelon, will you finish up here?" Erestor called into his assistant's office. "I am taking my family on a picnic." Without waiting for an answer the counselor took his wife's arm in one hand and the basket in another and led her out. _

Erestor stood abruptly and pushed his chair back. The memory of that day was so vivid he had to stop himself from dashing into the hall to look for his wife. In the first few weeks after the accident he would often wander the halls thinking she would be just around the next corner or in the next room. He had long ceased traveling the halls at night and scaring whatever unsuspecting servant came upon him. But, just sometimes, like tonight, a memory would take hold and it was all he could do not to leave the room.

Sighing, Erestor knew there was no way he could continue working. Stretching, Erestor went around the room putting out the lamps and candles. Stepping into the hallway he barely bit back a curse when he saw Faelon stumbling along the corridor. The younger elf had obviously had too much to drink. "Good evening, Faelon," Erestor greeted as civilly as he could. He was in no mood to deal with any love lorn suitors tonight.

* * *

Glorfindel moved along his balcony until he could no longer see Erestor. The dark-haired elf must be headed for bed, he mused. Sighing, he turned and headed back inside. He barely glanced at his bed before reaching for his robe. Maybe a glass of warm milk would help him find rest for whatever remained of the night. 

"What are you doing wandering the halls at this time of night?" Erestor asked when Faelon did not immediately return his greeting. As a matter of fact the younger elf just stared at Erestor without speaking. There was something unsettling in his chocolate eyes and it sent a shiver up the counselor's spine.

Then without a word, Faelon turned and stumbled back in the direction in which he had appeared. "That was...weird," Erestor said quietly before heading toward his own room. He was willing to chalk the younger elf's behavior up to too much wine and not enough rest.

As soon as he turned the corner Faelon stopped staggering and resumed a more normal gait. He had not expected the counselor to be in his office at such a late hour, but it was of little consequence, he could always get into the office unobserved latter. And, he had throughly enjoyed unnerving the usually unflappable Erestor.

Faelon let a small feral grin grace his features as his hand brushed the paper wrapped package in his pocket. It was only a matter of time before Erestor would be his. Erestor would forgive him for everything he had done and would have to do.

_Everything?_ Faelon let his smile slip when that treacherous voice spoke. He thought he had been successful in silencing his conscience a long time ago. "Everything," he assured that one part of him that had remained undeniably sane.

* * *

Me again. I will have reviewer responses in the next chapter which will be next week hopefully. And Faelon's plan and the depth of his insanity will be revealed. It will be a long one so you have been warned. Otherwise, please review. Flames of the constructive nature are welcomed. 


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